Waley's: Things said by Willie + Haley

Disclaimer: These really aren't that funny. They are just pretty stupid.

It's summer! Fortunately, I really like summer. Unfortunately, summer is close to ending. Willie and I have been spending lots of quality time together this summer.

Here are some things that happened or were said last Thursday.

1:
We saw this guy crossing the street and he had long, thick, immovable hair. It looked like a creature and it spurred this conversation.
Me: Is that his hair or is that a ferret-weasel? We saw a ferret/weasel at Cousin Camp. Are ferrets or weasels indigenous to that area?
Willie: It depends on which one is meaner.

Later on that day (or maybe the next day) we saw the same guy walking up the street wearing exercise clothes. His hair was definitely weird.

2:
Me: I think I need to get a job at Abs to start working off this jiggly belly. Is that George Clooney?

3:
Willie ordered a Sprite with lime and grape. At the Arctic Circle that's called a Lime Rickey, but at Abs it's called a Sprite-with-Lime-and-Grape. This particular Sprite with Lime and Grape was overflowing on the top of the lid.
Lady at Abs: Oops. Let me give you a napkin for that drink. It's a little over anxious.

4:
Willie made me a cd. He handed it to me.
Willie: Here is your cd. The songs are in reverse order. That may be awkward since it is a live album.

5:
It started raining really hard outside (not inside).
Willie: I am going to run across the street in the rain and then come back. What if I don't make it back alive?
6:
Throughout the day, I was drowsy. With his spray bottle in hand, Willie thought it was hi-larious to do this. He was Jim and I was Dwight. Then, as I took him to his football physical, he had the gall to tell me that my hair looked a little flat.



7:
Molly laughs at Yo Gabba Gabba (yes we were watching it with Uncle Willie because, no, we still do not have our regular cable channels back). The guest children on the show were Xanthe and Xoe (pronounced Zanthee and Zoey) and Lamese (pronounced Lamb-a-see).

8:
Listening to sophomore boys fill out a medical history form was quite interesting.
Austin: What is hosp-it . . . hosp-it-alization? Why do they make these words so difficult?
Austin: What's a convulsion?
Willie: It's like a seizure?
Sophomore physicals are also kind of funny because some of the boys can pee in a cup and some of the boys have to stand at the water cooler, drink water, and lose there place in line because they can't pee in a cup.

9:
Today I made Willie play this song on the piano. It's a classic! He hated it and acted a little bit like the boy who didn't like the Indian Song. Mom called during the lesson.
Mom: Hi . . .
Haley: Mom, you're interrupting our piano lesson.
Mom: Oh. How's he doing?
Haley: Well, he's not really cooperating with Waltzing Matilda? What's a billabong?
Mom: Just a second . . . I'll look it up . . . I hope it doesn't bring up any swear words.
I called tonight to ask about the plan for tomorrow and Willie was singing Waltzing Matilda in the background. My brainwashing must have worked.