Oh Dread, Part 2: Failure then Progress

Shall we continue discussing my daughter's bathroom issues?  Sure.

The short story is that we finally are gaining some ground and have had a successful Friday. The long story is that after a knock down, drag out, crying fest on Tuesday night and then again Wednesday afternoon, I decided to give up.  I went back to diapers with Molly and decided I was not going to mention anything about it to her.  I was sort of leaving-it-up-to-her-to-see-what-happened, and sort of quitting-because-I-was-overwhelmed-and-didn't-know-why-my-poor-child-kept-screaming, and sort of screaming-about-the-bathroom-can't-possibly-be-healthy-for-a-child-and-we-need-a-break.

Molly stayed dry all evening Wednesday, all night Wednesday, and all morning Thursday.  She must have a bladder made of steel.  On Thursday morning between about 8:30 and 10:30, she kept squirming and saying, "It's stuck," and then looking at me to see what my reaction was.  I ignored her for a little while and then engaged in several conversations about diapers versus going in the toilet, but that she had to go and couldn't hold it in all day.  She was super stressed.  The diaper won out.  

She stayed in her diaper all day until bath time.  I decided I would just ask her if she needed to go (she was still dry and had been since noonish . . . bladder of steel).  It took a little coaxing, a blanket, binker, tickling her toes, and a few matches, but within a few minutes . . . Success with NO Screaming!!!

After bath, big girl pants on.  

Super stress ensued again.  

Diaper went back on.  

Diaper off Friday morning.  

Diaper off for good, I hope.

She is asleep now and we have had 3 successful trips to the bathroom this morning!!
No accidents.  No tears.  No screaming.  

I think the kicker was that her bin of diapers in her changing table was empty.  I hadn't thought to empty it before (there are still plenty more in her closet), but I showed her there were no more diapers in it.  While she was super stressed after her bath Thursday night, I "found" 1 more diaper for her.  Her first successful trip this morning did take some coaxing again, but she remembered that she was wearing the last diaper.  "Last diaper?  Diapers all gone?"  "Yes, Molly there are no more diapers."  "I wear Jack's diapers."  "No Molly, Jack's diapers are for babies.  They are too small for you."  Somehow during this conversation, something clicked, I think.

This morning was definitely call for a celebration, so we went on our first official outing, just me, Molly, and Jack (first outing that involved more than drive-up windows only).  We went to Walgreens and got a prize (and some pictures of Jack I hadn't picked up yet)!

Thanks for everyone who has listened to my whining and given suggestions.  Let's keep our fingers crossed that this morning's success continues and we will have shortly mastered #1!

Meet Jack!

Hi!  My name is Jack.  I was reading on this blog and my mom wrote something like every day about my sister when she was born.  She's hardly written anything about me, so I guess I have to do it myself.

I'm a pretty chill little baby.  I don't cry much except I scream a lot when I get my diaper changed.  I really hate that.  I poop a whole awful lot and my bum has pretty much been sore since around day 2, so that is part of it, but I just don't like it.  My mom and dad are finally starting to figure out how to change my diaper a little.  Thank goodness!  I am so sick and tired of them letting me piddle in my face all the time.  That makes me scream even louder.

Anyway, I don't scream much.  My sister does a lot of that for me.  I don't know what's been going on the last 3 days, but man oh man has it been crazy around here.  I try to just close my eyes and be a good boy.

I sleep most of the day and then kind of wake up in the afternoon and evening for a little while at a time.  I sleep for 3 or 4 hour stretches at night.  My mom says that's pretty good, but I like to be held a lot and last night I didn't want her to put me down.  She could have just kept holding me.  I was up with her for like an hour and a half at one point because I just didn't want to be put back down in my bed.  She said that was ok, but it made her extra tired.

They warned me in heaven about being the number 2 kid.  They told me I wouldn't get my picture taken as much and that I would have to be a little bit more calm (and write my own blog posts).  They were definitely right about the picture taking thing and I am doing pretty darn good about the calm thing.

Here are some pictures my mom DID take of me lately.  

Oh dread, Part 1

We decided to toilet train Molly.  It is not going very well and is extremely frustrating.  You can stop reading there or if you would like to continue reading and comment with suggestions, I am open for any.  I probably shouldn't post stuff like this, but I am so frustrated that perhaps writing it down will help me re-evaluate what we are doing.

I read a ton online before beginning and I've read a ton more in the few moments I've had to spare during the last 2 days.  I thought I was prepared, that Molly was ready, and that things would go fairly smoothly.  Boy, was I ever wrong.

We've tried stickers, coloring, swedish fish rewards, reading books, dancing, singing songs, playing on the ipod, squirting water with a water bottle, blowing out matches, sucking on a binker with a blanket cape around her shoulder, setting the timer and "trying" every time it went off, and even shaking maracas while singing, "Molly pee-pees in the toilet, then we go outside . . ."

What's the problem?  She won't go.

Yesterday we earned 2 stickers on the sticker chart.  One was a for a few dribbles and the other was when she just couldn't hold it any longer.  We also had a few accidents.  Today we doubled that and earned 4 stickers on the sticker chart.  We had no accidents after around 8:30 this morning.  She started out more than happy to cooperate, sit on the toilet, and do all the fun things mentioned above . . .  until she actually needed to go.  She doesn't want anything to do with the toilet at that point and we end up with a screaming, overly dramatic 2 year old, crying and snotting herself into ridculousness while mom ends up holding her legs down until she finally lets go.  Once it its all done, she says, "I did it," gets a glimmer of excitement, and mom dances around like a crazy person to try to show her how cool that just was.

Unfortunately as the day wore on, the willingness to try and the fun stuff wore off.  We were in a major power struggle and sitting on the toilet was becoming a nightmare.  After many tears and gaseous sounds and smells from the 2 year old, I realized that perhaps the problem with the #1 was that a #2 was necessary as well.  We focused on that for a while and changed the lyrics to our maraca song.  It just got worse . . . we quit.  I failed.  We put a diaper on.

After about 2 hours, Molly finally relaxed, played around for a while, did her business, and quickly came and told me.  We took care of the diaper and put the big girl pants back on.  At first I asked her, "Do you want a diaper back on or big girl pants?"  She said,"put diaper on."  I said, "no. you'll wear big girl pants."   I was ready to give up completely, but then had the thought that since the #2 was taken care of momentarily, tomorrow might end up being more successful with #1.  She didn't argue and is wearing the big girl pants again.

She's asleep now.  She'll likely wake up dry (or to be cautious, I will wake her up before she has a chance to chill on her bed), which she has done for months.  In the morning we'll start again.

My mom and my sister are probably sick of me calling them and asking for help.  It has pretty much been the longest and most stressful 2 days of my life up to this point.  Big sigh.  I'm serious.  I thought I knew was stress and frustration were.  Wish us luck tomorrow.